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Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness., Lamentations 3:22-23Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight., Proverbs 3:5-6But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary., Isaiah 40:31Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God., Philippians 4:6-7The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing., Psalm 23:1Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go., Joshua 1:9For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future., Jeremiah 29:11Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest., Matthew 11:28And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose., Romans 8:28God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble., Psalm 46:1For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life., John 3:16For we live by faith, not by sight., 2 Corinthians 5:7Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path., Psalm 119:105I can do all this through him who gives me strength., Philippians 4:13So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you., Isaiah 41:10I lift up my eyes to the mountains, where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth., Psalm 121:1-2Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see., Hebrews 11:1Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud., 1 Corinthians 13:4But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control., Galatians 5:22-23Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart., Psalm 37:4But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well., Matthew 6:33The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you., Zephaniah 3:17Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness., Lamentations 3:22-23Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight., Proverbs 3:5-6But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary., Isaiah 40:31Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God., Philippians 4:6-7The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing., Psalm 23:1Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go., Joshua 1:9For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future., Jeremiah 29:11Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest., Matthew 11:28And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose., Romans 8:28God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble., Psalm 46:1For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life., John 3:16For we live by faith, not by sight., 2 Corinthians 5:7Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path., Psalm 119:105I can do all this through him who gives me strength., Philippians 4:13So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you., Isaiah 41:10I lift up my eyes to the mountains, where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth., Psalm 121:1-2Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see., Hebrews 11:1Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud., 1 Corinthians 13:4But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control., Galatians 5:22-23Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart., Psalm 37:4But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well., Matthew 6:33The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you., Zephaniah 3:17

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Mentoring & discipleship

Raising SpiritualSons & Daughters

Teachers are many. Fathers are few. A book about the patient, costly work of raising people who carry faith, character and calling into the next generation.

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By Matthew (Tolu) Olowoyeye · Berean Publishing House

Raising Spiritual Sons and Daughters, book cover by Matthew (Tolu) Olowoyeye

A generation is looking for fathers

There has never been more teaching available, and rarely less spiritual parenting. Content is everywhere. Formation is scarce.

This book is about the difference: how to move beyond information into relationship, correction, trust, honour and release, so that those you raise can stand, serve and lead when you are no longer the one holding them up.

“Do not raise followers who need you. Raise sons and daughters who can carry what you carried, and further.”

Fathering, not franchising

Spiritual parenting builds sons and daughters who can stand, not dependants who cannot move without you.

Formation before platform

Character, obedience and hidden faithfulness come long before visibility and responsibility.

Release, not retain

The measure of true mentoring is what continues after your voice is no longer in the room.

Inside the book

Ten chapters move from the call to spiritual parenting, through the daily work of formation, to the legacy that continues beyond you.

Part One · The Call to Spiritual Parenting

  • 1. A Generation Without Fathers
  • 2. Teachers Are Many, Fathers Are Few
  • 3. The Heart of a Spiritual Parent

Part Two · The Work of Formation

  • 4. Character Before Gifting
  • 5. Correction That Builds
  • 6. Teaching Them to Hear God
  • 7. Trust, Access and Honour

Part Three · The Legacy

  • 8. Sending, Not Holding
  • 9. When Sons and Daughters Fail
  • 10. A Generation That Outlives You

Who this book is for

Pastors and church leadersMentors and disciplersYouth and young-adult leadersSmall-group and cell leadersParents raising children in faithEmerging leaders being mentoredMinistry training schoolsLeadership development teams

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The e-book is delivered instantly by email after checkout, with every chapter, reflection and prayer included.

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About the author

Matthew (Tolu) Olowoyeye is a pastor, teacher and mentor whose work centres on faith, character and the development of people. He writes as someone who has both been fathered and been trusted with others.

More about Matthew (Tolu) Olowoyeye →

Questions

Is this book only for pastors?

No. It is written for anyone entrusted with the spiritual formation of others: mentors, group leaders, youth workers, parents and leaders developing emerging leaders.

What is the difference between teaching and spiritual parenting?

Teaching transfers information; spiritual parenting transfers life, character and identity. The book draws that distinction repeatedly and shows what fathering in the faith actually requires.

Does it deal with correction and failure?

Yes. Separate chapters cover correction that builds rather than crushes, and how to respond with grace and truth when spiritual sons and daughters fail.

Can it be used to train a team?

Yes. The chapter reflections and prayers make it suitable for personal reading, mentoring relationships, leadership teams and ministry training groups.

Raise people, not followers.

Begin the patient work of forming sons and daughters who will still be standing, serving and building long after your season has ended.

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